We have all heard the saying, "if you have low expectations, you can only be pleasantly surprised." Well, if you are out there dating, you may want to adopt this as your mantra. There are some people that can look great on paper, and yet be complete idiots in person. Some people post pictures from when they were younger, skinnier, or had more hair, and then when you meet them you find a totally different person in front of you. Then there are those who might appear fine during the first few dates, but as time wears on you start to see icky character traits. The latter are the toughest ones to deal with because if they have made it through the first few rounds of 20 questions, you cannot help but start to hope for the best. Yet the best thing to do here, is curb your enthusiasm.
If you have zero expectations as to when someone should call, email, text or set up the next date, then you won't be disappointed with whatever timeframe they chose for themselves. In the meantime, you just need to figure out whether their behavior works for you. If someone really wants to make something work, they will make the time. We all have busy lives and varying interests, but let's face it, when we meet someone that causes us to say "wow," we can shift things around to pursue a relationship that seems worth it. If that is not happening, then you just need to accept that s/he is "just not that into you."
As my best friend from college told me recently, when you are in love, "you will move heaven and Earth to be with that person." She is right, I have done this a few times in my life, and as a result I believe it is totally worth waiting for that perfect inspiration. So, while I am advocating that we start off dating with zero expectations, please do not mistake the message to be that we should settle for good enough. There is no point to settling; finding that "wow" factor is totally worth the wait.
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