Wednesday, February 20, 2013

The Ostrich Syndrome

Over the years, I've seen so many people suffer from this problem-- they try to hide from reality by digging their heads in the sand.  Do they honestly think that if they ignore an issue it will just go away?  Well sadly, it never seems to work that way-- in fact the opposite is more likely to occur.  By trying to avoid dealing with an uncomfortable situation, it blows up into something so much greater.  There are so many times where I think with great regret how easy it would have been to solve a client's problem if they had just come in right away, before things got really bad.  Little problems are usually easy to fix, but big problems are sometimes ignored far too long and become issues beyond repair.

This ostrich syndrome is quite common, and often times it will take outside intervention to help a person recognize what is going on and find the strength to face things head on.  As a divorce professional, it is precisely my job to tackle issues on behalf of those that simply can't defend themselves.  It is also my duty to keep people on task, and brainstorm solutions as soon as issues arise.  Unfortunately, I am only dealing with one part of someone's life, and often times, they are perpetuating this pattern of behavior in other areas of life, such that they create a perfect storm scenario.  It is incredibly sad to watch a seemingly strong individual spiral downward as they get hit with a series of unfortunate events that send them to a very dark place.

Sometimes, despite Herculean efforts, I'm not able to make miracles happen, and this is particularly true in the very unforgiving process known as litigation.  The wins can be great, but the losses can be devastating, and that is my biggest warning to people that want to head down that path.  Especially for those with a tendency to go MIA or flee when things get tough, the last place on Earth you want to find yourself is in the ring with a bunch of gladiators.  Someone with ostrich tendencies is like a sacrifical lamb just asking to be slaughtered before the true games begin.

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