As summer approaches and people put the final touches on their wedding plans before mailing out all those invitations, I always see a spike in requests for prenuptial agreements. Typically, these do not take a lot of time if they are simple and straight forward, which means they should not be very expensive- and what you buy is an incredible peace of mind.
People don't expect to get into a car crash, but they put a seat belt on just in case. Well, the same logic should apply to a prenup-- my new motto is that it is the best way to play it safe in a world where you have a 50/50 shot at together forever.
In a few weeks, I have been invited to comment on t.v. about what happens without a prenup. Many seem to be unaware of the fact that in some states indefinite alimony still exists-- which means it may only end upon death or remarriage of the recepient. Although alimony is only involved in about 20% of all divorces these days, it does still pose a risk for many who dealing with an unexpected split all of the sudden have to try and figure out the amount of support and duration a partner may need until s/he is self-supporting.
As I mentioned on the radio a few weeks ago, prenups can eliminate a lot of anxiety for couples-- because it forces them to discuss up front what they want to define as martial versus non-marital. We can set caps or completely waive alimony. We can even include clauses that provide that in the event of a dispute over any issues when a divorce arises, the parties will first try mediation or a Collaborative Divorce prior to any court filings.
The other day, while I was lecturing about love and divorce, someone asked me if I would ever re-marry. Clearly everyone seems to relish in the fact that I am a divorce lawyer by day, who blogs about love at night, and it is no secret that I am still very much a hopeless romantic. That said, I answered the question with total honesty-- of course I want to re-marry, but NOT without a prenup.
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