Apparently there are about 80 Million step families in the US. These families deserve some major props. It is hard enough taking two adults that are very different and having them find compromise ground-- learning each other's love languages and how to communicate and resolve conflict; understanding each other's past and forgiving one another's mistakes; detaching from negative influences and taking a chance on a completely new life are all major first steps-- now add to all these challenges a few little people with their own set of concerns and already established patterns.
Finding a compromise house that fits everyone's criteria can be very difficul, and once that home is identified you still face commuting issues for kids, re-arranging schedules, having to discuss new rules for a new house, and you need to address the household budget, taking into account differences that may result from one child being in the house only half the time, while someone else may have multiple kids that are around more often.
Going through furniture and art that will not survive the merger can be very emotional, but that is nothing compared to the work it wil take teaching kids to share their parents' time with others. This is precisely why experts suggest that you take your time blending families, and it explains why the odds are so stacked against blended families in terms of success-- they have about a 30% chance of survival. Finding a good support network and asking for help when you get overwhelmed, are key. I have blended families are very open in sharing their stories of trials and tribulations. You guys are amazing!!!
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