Saturday, April 26, 2014

Do You Have Compatible Baggage?

Let's face it, after age 35 we all have some baggage that we carry with us.  Our life experiences shape who we are, and there's nothing to be ashamed of-- we've all made mistakes, and as long as we've learned from them and not allowed ourselves to just dwell in the past, then all is good.  Now the key is to find someone with compatible baggage.

Think of it this way-- if you are about to embark on a journey, do you want a companion with an empty suitcase?  That would just be weird-- and I also don't think you want to travel with someone whose suitcase is full of dirty laundry, that is just going to require a lot of extra and unnecessary work for both of you.  Indeed, the goal is to find someone who has done his/her laundry, nicely folded his/her clothes, and is now ready for an adventure.

Backpacking through Europe 20 years ago, I learned to travel light and only carry the essentials.  Crashing in a hostel wasn't a big deal, it was the experience that I cared about-- and it was amazing to see such beauty in the world, but one thing was clear-- regardless of how amazing these experiences were I missed not having someone special by my side.

Fast forward to 20 years later, I whole-heartedly admit I still feel the same way-- and although I've been able to see a tremendous amount of beauty, without a significant someone, I've always felt something lacking.  Sadly, the older and more powerful we've all become, it's gotten very hard to find someone that is okay living in a tiny apartment and not driving the latest luxury car.  Simply put, I would prefer a travel companion that doesn't want to be tied down to material things so that instead we can explore the world full of wonders together, and let me tell you finding  someone that shares this view in DC is like searching for a unicorn.

Now, we all want different things, especially at different stages of life, and no one is right or wrong for wanting what s/he thinks is necessary to find happiness.  The key, however, is going through your own baggage first so that once you've done your own inventory you can recognize someone that aligns with your vision for the future.  It may take a very long while looking for that needle in the haystack-- but trust me, it will all be worth it in the end when you find that person whose suitcase perfectly coordinates with your own.

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