Friday, May 10, 2013

My True Mother's Day Gift

Both my mother and grandmother struggled as single moms, sometimes working two jobs in order to make ends meet.  Through them I learned the importance of hard work and putting your kids' needs before your own.  Little did they know how necessary it would be for me to see them endure such hardships-- and either did I until recently.

My grandmother died a few months ago, and I will always remember how we both always had vivid dreams.  There was one that I had from 20 years ago which was our favorite:  I was walking with her along a dirt path, and suddenly we came to a fork in the road.  She started to go towards the left by herself, while I was destined to go to the right.  I didn't want to go by myself, and I started to cry.  She was adamant that it was her time to reunite with her family, but that I needed to go forward on my own path.  Pressing me close to her one last time she said, "you won;t be alone."  All of a sudden, a beautiful angel appeared- with thick blond hair and kind blue eyes, and smiling at me he said, "I will always be with you."

Twenty years later, I now understand the full meaning of that dream.  That angel is my son-- the sweet blond hair, blue eyed child, who recently spoke up and saved me from making the worst mistake of my life.  He found his voice just in time to prevent a true disaster from occuring-- and spared me years of agony.  I ignored so many red flags, but he did not-- he captured everything; meanwhile in the darkest of moments, a funny thing happened- I started praying again-- the same prayers my grandmother taught me so many years ago. 

Leaving behind the promise of a house and spouse is not easy, but my family has rallied by my side in such an amazing way ever since I called off my June wedding, and their love has just filled my heart with pure love.  Unconditional love-- that is the true gift of motherhood, and so it is with deep gratitude that I share our story with others this Mother's Day weekend.  May you all fill your hearts with joy this weekend as you celebrate with your own families.

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